Cup Eve and not a Creature is Stirring

Well here we are, Cup eve. I must admit these Aussie's are a funny bunch - who'd have thought we'd have such a build up to a horse race? Wouldn;t get it at home that's for sure, the Gold Cup barely rates a mention, bit of interest in the Grand National but more for the photos of pissed scousers doing stupid things...

Plenty of that here too if Derby day was any indication. What the bloody hell were those pissed louts doing sliding down a soaked tarpaulin in their suits? Clearly from the south east suburbs I'd imagine, gets a bit willing out that way I hear with all the teenage pregnancies and shootings and what not. Lucky I'm safe in Werribee!

I had to look away though when I saw a dreadfully pissed young man drinking beer out of a muddy shoe, I've seen a few odd things in my days travelling to Turkey and Sweden and what not - some kinky folk there I can assure you - but booze from a boot? My God!

Between you and I, old Bauer is a bit nervy at the moment. Sore leg you see, poor old chap. Hell of a long way to come for a horse race if you're not going to run! Tried to blame me of course, apparently he slipped on the way back to the stables after a big night on the scotch with yours truly and claimed that I was negligent in letting him walk home! Disgraceful! His own silly fault he can't hold his drink I say.

Tez Bailey and the Vets (sounds like an 80's pop band doesn't it?) will be around in the morning to check him out. We'll see what they say.

Bit of a rumour going around that Campanologist might be a bit, ahem, how do I put it, queer. I'd heard some gossip back home that his fifth leg only appears in the company of geldings and after seeing him turn down that Scottish filly Eastern Aria behind the sheds the other night I'd have to say that there is some truth to the rumour! It all adds up really, those trips to Germany, no doubt freuqenting those clubs you here of...

Anyway I best be off, big day tomorrow and all that. Someone told me that a couple of the bookies have me at $3.50 to finish in the first 10! Easy money I say, I've sent young Willy out to have something on for yours truly...

See you at the track

Blue